humour

This is kinda cool. In case you were wondering about the reading level of this site...

Every year we hear ridiculous insults, stupid questions, naive lunacies, and straight out racist bull. Lets collect the worst and funniest stuff said about Islam and Muslims this year. Put it in the comments section. Then we'll sort out the top 10 lunacies said about Muslims this year, put them in a poll and let readers vote on what is the absolutely most stupid and insulting thing said about Muslims this year!

Collect them all!

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I absolutely love this parody on Chamillionaire's "Catch me ridin dirty" by Weird Al Yankovic, "White and nerdy."

"...I'm nerdy in the extreme/and whiter than sour cream

Spend every weekend at the Renaissance fair/and have my name on my underwear..."

Yup.

I'd been thinking off and on about a Muslim parody on that parody of that song, with a Shukr-style-wearing sister as a lead singer and brothers in thobes, kufis and beards doing backup---in front of a major airport.  And you could have a scene going through the carry-on luggage inspection, with an inspector taking a whole bunch of incriminating items out of the sister's Shukr tote bag: a Quran, Reliance of the Traveller, a flask of Zamzam water, prayer beads, a prayer rug, Quran cassette tapes.... 

I saw a poster today which transfixed me.

It had a large cross, red, white and blue with stars and stripes. Above it was written, "Kill in the name of Jesus." And to the lower side, in smaller letters, "Our god is better than their god."

The whole thing was labelled, "fundamental hatred."

Wow.

Whoever designed that one had succeeded in being almost blasphemously funny, mordantly ironic, and deeply Christian all at the same time. 

On one level, the poster makes fun of certain right-wing, pro-war interpretations of Christianity which seem to be gaining a lot of traction nowadays in the US.

I just realized in a flash of brilliance how a woman can have more than one husband in Islam! Temporary Marriage! If she's got a set schedule with them, she can make each contracted period end before the next one arrives.

Now if I were to become a second wife, I would insist on this sort of thing.

As the fairy tale goes, what is good for the golden goose is....wait how does it go?

*This is part of the "fractured" series and is meant to be taken lightly, as a joke even, with a bit of deeper meaning to be found at its heart. The fractured series is based on "Fractured Fairy Tales" from the old Rocky and Bullwinkle show.

Happy Birthday Hedonist!  This totally skeevy guy will be arriving at your house later with flowers to escort you to a Rainbow Festival where you will be hugged a whole lot, get to know people by their smell and their natural name, and be worshipped as the incarnation of Gaia!  But seriously, may God unravel your troubles and make everything beautiful easy for you, lots of love from everyone at PI.Org.  

This is my attempt, I think some of them are funny! I want yours!

You might be a Jewish-American-Muslim if.….

1. You say “oy” before “Alhamdolelah fi kulli shay”
2. You think freshly made gefilte fish with homemade horseradish is sunna for Iftar dinner
3. You know you are a notch above the South Asian Princesses since they wouldn’t know Prada from Miu Miu from Prada Sport and why, of course, Prada Sport is best.
4. You think you got away with something because it is easier to keep halal than kosher.
5. Other Muslims search the web for Rabbinic opinions to support their positions when you won’t agree with them.
6. You answer every question with, “Let me tell you a story...”.
7. The first thing Jews and Muslims alike want to know about you is your “position” on Isreal.
8. You are secretly relieved that, other than the Naqshbandis, Sufi guys don’t dress like Hasids.
9. You’d never be seen in one of those polyester Saudi schmatas.
10. You think of going to juma as going to shul and you aren't wrong.

Have you got a Redneck Sunna Beard and Kufi?

While cruising DA's blog with my morning tea and toast, I came across this hysterical list. He grabbed it from Hispanic Muslims. Check their site out, too, terrific stuff. I can claim to have done numbers 1, 8, 13, 17, 22, 25 (meaning I wish it were), and 52. I wonder how many Mike Knight would yes to, he really has that Shia Redneck thing down. I think we need to make up our own list...you might be a [what?] muslim if... I'm going to try some during the day. You all do too, let's build our own list!

You might be a redneck Muslim...

1. If you say "Assalam Alaiykum ya'll."
2. If you tip you hat when you say "Assalam Alaiykum ya'll."
3. If you put your boots back on after salat.
4. If your thobe or kufi is a camouflage color.
5. If you hunt between magrib and Isha.
6. If you fish, swim, bath, and perform wudu in the same body of water.
7. If you prefer to pray outside your trailer.
8. If you think the greatest jihad is praying magrib during WWF Wrestling.
9. If you think the greatest jihad consists of spraypainting "Allah Akbar" on a water tower.
10. If you ever wonder why the Jerry Springer Show hasn't called you yet.

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Cair-approved Satirical cartoon on Lebanon

It has Ibrahim Hooper's stamp of approval.

So what is this all about the prohibition of interest? What is credit? Does credit and interest apply to money alone? I was thinking about this while at brunch with my friends. They were laughing at me, not with me. But I insist that there is a deep point to this bit of silliness, just like all posts in the "fractured" series.

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