love and family. change

I feel a sense of frustration and like a failure because everything that has happened over the course of my marriage. (I start to cry as I right this) I feel like a batter in World Series that has struck-out for the final time with two teammate on base and two outs. I went into marriage ill prepared for the true difficulties that arises and how to handle them. In my marriage their were so many demons that rose from two broken childhoods; my wife and I battled the buried ghost of abused and neglected children which took their adult form in us. I suppose I didn’t truly have a great example in my own father who many years was a great dad then who turned into a drug user and deadbeat in time I became him in my own way. Thou I did gain a great father figure in the form of an uncle who I love and call “pops”, he’s the father I hope to be! I could just copout and blame a broken childhood for everything but I am a big believer in personal responsibility for ones actions.