When I surf the internet, I tend to gravitate toward the blogs of other women who are also in polygamy. Misery loves company, and all that.

Most of what I find is awful. There's something that's just so sad about seeing otherwise intelligent women lobotomize their minds in the name of Islam as they try (and fail) to squash themselves into the mold of the "ideal Muslimah", and parrot the usual inadequate rationalizations. I understand all too well why they do it—-been there, done that—-but it's so depressing all the same.

But once in a while, I happen upon a piece which is a treat to read, if only because it's so honest. This morning, I was absolutely delighted to see that Peacefulmuslimah has come out and said what I've been secretly thinking for a while now: that she thinks that if her husband had just gone and had an affair, it would have been less humiliating for her than his polygamy.

I was just reading Ali Eteraz' excellent post on Muslim Polygamy in North America.  I responded there, and I'll repeat it here:

I have been offered marriage as a second wife.  It is a girlfriend kind of thing.  The idea is he comes and sees me, we have a great weekend, he leaves and takes his dirty underwear with him.  But he takes his dirty underwear back to his first wife who then has to wash them along with all the other laundry and care for all the detritus of their lives including the burden of not being enough for him no matter what she does.  What ass would even think that a woman with any self-respect would do that to another woman?!  Urgh.  I was talking to Hedonist about this the other day.  You know how much she has posted on this issue.